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Challenges

Aug 09 2017

A Bit of Moses

As Yom Kippur draws to an end, I find myself changing gears from being a spiritual leader to a coach as the players enter the final inning or the last round. People are tired, it's been a couple of weeks of preparation for the High Holidays and then two days of Rosh Hashanah, a long evening of Kol Nidrai and now after a full day of fasting, everybody (me included) is wiped out.   So, as we enter Neilah, the finally prayer of the season, I find myself serving as coach. Instead of...

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Jul 26 2017

See, what you’re gonna see!

It's always a little humbling when the lights go on. Suddenly you see how you really appear. It's humiliating, embarrassing and most of all humbling.   I'm talking about perspective, worldviews, paradigms, etc. We think a certain way based on our upbringing, other influences and our own choosing. Of course, we have only those tools to work from. So we engage with the world from that vantage point. Sometimes that vantage point and paradigm is helpful and sometimes it becomes a point of tension and contention between us and others.   Then one...

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Jul 19 2017

Thank you G-d for afflicting me, please hit me again!

Said no one ever! Or maybe they did. There is a sentiment among certain religious groups to preach the idea that suffering is good, should be welcomed and thanked for. To be fair these are fundamental Jewish values as well and can all be sourced to the Midrash, Talmud and other good sources. But to say thank you?   Let me put the subtle distinction in context.   We all face challenges in life. When we experience challenge in life the growing person looks at the challenge and finds lessons to learn, ways...

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Jul 12 2017

Say What You’re Gonna Say, Do What You’re Gonna Do

Talk is cheap, although it seems to come at a big price these days. But really, anyone with an opinion articulates it without fear. That is in part because today everyone feels that speaking your mind is ok no matter the context, language or opinion.   How about action? Doing? Society today has accepted pretty much any behavior as acceptable. However, those behaviors are generally behaviors of self expression. In other words, society has accepted that anything you do to express yourself is acceptable.   What about doing as it relates to doing the...

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Jul 05 2017

Sensitivity and Today’s Media

Wax on, wax off. Practice makes perfect.   Each year as we study the weekly Torah portion, we inevitably chance upon small or big nuggets that jump out and provide a transformative life lesson.   It's also amazing how they seem to always present themselves right at the time that we as a society or as an individual need to hear that lesson.   Look at today's headlines. Any headlines, any website, any news service. I challenge you to find a website that doesn't have a list of insults and shaming comments about some politician, hollywood...

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Jun 29 2017

A False World

In this week's Torah portion we read of the passing of Aaron the High Priest - Kohen Gadol. It says that all the People mourned him for 30 days. The reason for this our Sages say is that Aaron was lover of peace and a pursuer of peace.   The Kabbalah tells us that the world is a "false world". What you see is almost never what you get. There is always something else beneath the surface.     This reality of our world makes the ideal of truth a hard one to live by. Try matching truth...

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Jun 21 2017

I choose

I recently attended a funeral of a dear friend and young man. A real tragedy and sad day. One of the speakers, a good friend of the deceased shared his memories but he presented his comments in a unique fashion.   He framed all of his memories by saying "I choose to remember". I choose to remember the deceased for this particular quality and proceeded to share an anecdote. He did this over and over again and it suddenly it hit me. He was not only saying these words but actually engaging...

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Jun 14 2017

Of Spies and Souls

When we think of a spy we may think hero or villain - depending if your team is the one spying or being spied on. In this week's Torah portion we read of the 12 spies going to spy on behalf of the Jewish People in and on the Land of Israel.   These spies (10 of them at least) who left as hero's (Heads of the Children of Israel the Torah calls them) became villains, meeting their death in the desert.   A spy integrates him or herself into the environment that they...

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Jun 07 2017

Mazal Tov and Let them Rise Up

Sarah Chana Radcliffe, a respected family therapist writes the following: Older kids as well as teens need more space to do things their own way. Parents, on the other hand, want to help their kids do things the best way, the safest way, the rightest way - THEIR way. They often suffer tremendous anxiety in letting go of the reigns. If you feel a strong need to give your older child lots of instructions, remember this: he learned everything you had to offer in his first decade. You did a great...

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Mar 22 2017

Stressed Out?

Are you stressed out? Do you work too hard? You might be using your brain too much!   In this week's Torah portion, the Torah tells us "six days work shall be done". Passively.   King David tells us that work should be the toil of our hands (palms to be exact) not the toil of our heads. Our heads ought to be focused on life's purpose. When we are overly invested in our work we use up vital brain energy and it stresses us out and exhausts us.   Why should we not overly invest...

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