Happily Ever After

We stand under a Chuppah to indicate that the marriage takes place under the Heavenly Eye of G-d.

We place a ring on the finger to demonstrate the Infinite One’s involvement in our union.

We circle the groom 7 times to establish a Divine Protective Wall around the couple.

Why all this G-d Involvement in what should be a simple ceremony to demonstrate the committment of two lovers to each other?

Marriage is the union between two finite people. By definition the finiteness of the two means that I stop here and you start there. We join together in our parenting, in life decisions, in reproduction, but all in all these are finite experiences.

To ensure an eternal bond (on this earth and according to the mystics in the world to come as well) one must connect through something that is infinite.

Hence G-d’s participation in the ceremony, the Heavens Above, the Infiniteness of the ring and the circle under the Chuppah.

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Although marriage is likely the single most important relationship in our lives, we have plenty of other important relationships. How do we ensure an eternal connection?

In this week’s Torah portion, when Judah approaches Joseph arguing for the release of Benjamin, he says “and his (Benjamin’s) soul is bound up with his (Jacob’s) soul”.

One of the commentators identifies the numeric equivalence of the Hebrew word for bound (Keshurah) as equal to the numeric equivalence of the word Torah. As such Judah was saying that the soul of Benjamin is bound up through Torah with the soul of Jacob. Since they studied Torah together, the bond is an eternal one and thus if you don’t return Benjamin to Jacob I can’t imagine to see the pain that Jacob will experience.

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A new businessmen once asked the Rebbe for a blessing for his new partnership. The Rebbe suggested that the two have a weekly study session together to ensure that their business take on an eternal dimension to it.

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As the 2017 year has begun and many people take on new years resolutions, it’s a good time to think about strengthening important relationships. Take your friend, business partner or spouse to a Torah class or begin to study together (eg. read the weekly Torah portion together) it will surely strengthen and bring an eternal dimension to your relationship.

With blessings of Good Shabbos!