Every generation thinks that theirs is the most difficult one in which to raise good upstanding children. With the exposure today to all kinds of media, with access to substances of all kinds at the ready, it’s no wonder that we are more consumed than ever with concern about the next generation.

Part of what taints are concern is our own life experience and our own character and genetic make up.  We want our kids to be like the best of us.  When they don’t seem to be going down that path we get nervous that maybe the path they are on is not a good one.  It could consume one with worry and sleeplessness.

The Torah portion opens with the words these are the offspring of Isaac son of Abraham, Abraham begot Isaac. Abraham epitomized kindness.  In my mind he was an outgoing, friendly, easy to talk to, always kind type of person.  Isaac on the other hand represents discipline, he was quiet, reserved, focused and calculated.  Yet, father takes pride in son and son takes pride in father.  In this relationship we are taught what real parenting is about.

We are entrusted with the care of our children as a gift and a responsibility, but we don’t own our children. We can’t make them into anything we want to make them into we can only try to influence them.  The best influence of course is being a role model.  A role model for what our core values are, not a role model of personality.  They will be who they will be.  They are a different human being and although they possess our genes, their genes are their own.

Accepting that fact is the first step into accepting our children for who they are.  And accepting our children for who they are is the best thing we can do to raise them as good upstanding citizens.  This doesn’t mean that we accept negative behavior, it does mean that we stop trying to create our children into our own image.

King Solomon says this in the famous verse “educate a child according to his path, and when he gets older it will not depart from him”.

This weeks Torah portion says this in the pride that Abraham takes in his son, despite their differences and it is reflected in Isaac’s pride in his father in return.